funny tings we say

jerry j: what's your last name?
dan: greuel.
jerry j: what? royal?
dan: no, greuel.
jerry j: oh, greuel! well, i remember it by thinking of "royal" and imagine a crown on your head... it will be very regal.
dan: *smile*
jerry j: oh no, i hope i don't start calling you dan gregal!

fortune cookie: for someone to fall in love with you, you need to give them something to trip on.
dan b-p: ...like acid.

micaiah: (watching mr. dolence sleep the yo-yo) look at it go!
courtney smith: that yo-yo's not asleep, it's in a coma!
mr. dolence: i guess i've got a knack for putting things to sleep.

mr. dolence: they say there's going to be seven inches of snow tonight, so be prepared to stay home tomorrow!
jessica: it won't be a problem. i'm used to seven inches.
emily: !!

courtney smith: (showing off his biceps) look at this rock!
emily: that rock must be volcanic, because i see a lot of ash!

(this rib got the only ever score of 10 on courtney's shat-o-meter.)

micaiah: let's have a yo-yo contest. my first trick is walking the dog.
courtney smith: i can top that. i'm going to C-WALK the dog!

ms. zimmerman: (looking a photograph of mr. kroncke) oh, are you doing a self-portrait of mr. kroncke? i mean..
emily: I WISH!

mrs miller: (looking a photograph of mr. kroncke) he looks like a bad-ass, but he's really just a big softie.
emily: literally AND figuratively!

emily: i am done with my extended essay!


OH WAIT, THAT'S NOT FUNNY. IT'S TRUE!